So Tim takes the early-bird, Campbell, to the dry cleaner this morning.

Now, if you have never heard the pure pleasure of Campbell’s volume, it is kind of like a bull horn. She has no concept of volume control. Because she is the tiniest in the family, we give her the excuse of trying to make up for her stature. Bottom line…she has been a loud ass from the moment she was born. Even the nurses couldn’t believe the set of lungs she had for being so little. Gosh, we are blessed!

Anyway, back to the story.

As Tim gets off a phone call, Campbell yells from the back, “Who was that?”

Tim replies, “My boss!”

Campbell, the-ever-so-smart, four going on fourteen girl, says, “You mean…MOMMY?”

While she may drive me nuts on a hourly, daily, weekly basis…I got to love every inch of her. She is not only super sharp, she’s got my back!

We’d be millionaires if we could ‘bottle-up’ this sound.  It would do wonders for people that suffer from depression.  How can you not giggle along?

Memo

Spring is in the air…and summer is just around the corner.  We are all growing excited.  No more getting up early.  No more packing lunches.  Hopefully, no more early morning yelling (we’ll see about that!). 

I setup a tea party for the girls because it was perfect outdoors, and my friend wanted to get some pictures of the new Stella & Dot jewlery for girls.  My frustration grew because within minutes the sweet setting I had created was a disaster. 

What is it with my girls (and their cousin, Elin)?  How did I get destructive girls!?!  Is it just there is more than one?  Will this end?  Will I someday be thankful because they will not let anyone push them around and will speak up for their beliefs?  Calgon, take me away!

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Four has always been my favorite age. A four-year old understands most concepts, their language is well-developed, they are fairly self-sufficient, they are no longer a danger to themselves, etc.

With the twins quickly approaching four in July, I am just waiting for the switch to begin. Honestly, it doesn’t look as if it is.

My silence on the blog is due to two main factors:

1) I am chest deep in planning the Inaugural luanch of our nonprofit for FamilyPrint on April 23rd. 

2)  Three weeks ago, I randomly in a fit of rage decided to take the TV away indefinitely (another blog post about this will come soon).

3)  The twins have been on a destruction streak.

Here is the list of things they have done recently:

+ While standing on my beloved, L-shaped, glass-top desk in my office, Campbell drops a large marble.  It clearly hit it in just the right spot because one side of it shattered.  Had she fallen through she would have sliced herself open from head to foot.  Thankfully, she did not.  However, as soon as I saw that she didn’t have a scratch on her, I was furious.  I am now unhappily typing on a hard piece of plywood that has since been written on.  And, it doesn’t look nearly as sleek as my cool glass. 

+ At the first sign of warm weather, the kids ran to play with the neighbors.  Apparently, they needed a Costco-sized box of Cheerios to snack on!  While I was out of sight for approximately two minutes they managed to crush the entire contents into the wood deck.  If we don’t have a host of rodents swarming around our house soon, I will be in shock.

+  Some stickers are easily removed others are not.  In an effort to bide some time while I worked on Briggs science project, I gave the girls a box of old file folder stickers.  They covered the hardwood floor.  Briggs and I were on our hands and knees scraping them off for an hour.

+  Laundry.  I am not a big fan of the washing-drying-folding-putting it away process…especially after ten loads a week.  But when I get it to the final stage of having all of the clothes folded to find my neat piles thrown over the banister from the second floor to the first…well it doesn’t fill me with happy thoughts.  It makes me want to put the girls to bed early and lock them behind their door.

+ Campbell is so thrilled with writing that she doesn’t stop.  With a pen and paper constantly in her hand, she writes all day.  Unfortunately, she found a paint pen.   Once Tim noticed a strong smell coming from the dining room, it was too late.  She was just laying on the floor writing away while the paint pen leaked through to the hardwoods.  Thank goodness for Mr. Clean’s Magic Eraser.  The inventors have no idea how they changed the lives of mothers.

+ We used to have four cordless phones.  We don’t even have one anymore.  I am pretty confident that we will find them out in the yard as the snow melts.

The list just continues.  I wonder if magically on their fourth birthday they are going to change their ways.   It makes me think my grandmother must really be enjoying all of this chaos up in Heaven.

So our neighbor likes cars…nice cars.  He now has five.  They are a family of three.  So we heckle him from time to time. 

As I pulled out of the driveway today with the kids, we saw our car-loving neighbor.  I rolled down the window to say hello.  Then out of the backseat chimes Campbell, “What the heck!  You got another car!  Where are you gonna park it?”

That’s our three year old!

Want a visual of me in the morning trying to get my kids out the door?  Think Michael Jackson Thriller video and use this quote from Campbell tonight.

“Mom, remember when you were like a monster this morning before we went to Montessori?  You kind of growled like the monster in the Michael Jackson video.  Are you a werewolf?  You are so funny, Mom.”

She is right.  I think I did growl. 

I dread the morning hustle out the door.  Does it go well for anyone out there?  What is your trick? 

Do you do it calmly with laughter and ease?  Do your kids listen the first time you ask them to put their shoes and coats on?  Do they remember their bags?  Do they laugh and play with each other or hit and scream?  Do they select healthy choices for breakfast or try to sneak cookies when you aren’t looking?  Do they plead for their blankies once you are backing out of the garage? 

Do you look in the mirror and resemble one of the transformed zombies from Thriller?

I try not to be the mom that brags about her kids but I was downright impressed when my three year old handed me this today.  Plus, I do have three other children to compare, and none of them were writing their name this legibly at this age. Go Campbell! 

I know well enough that I am aging as the days quickly pass.   It is evidently clear to me when I look in the mirror every morning.  But the girls have started suggesting that I play the ‘grandma’ role.  Of course, when the twins play “Mommy-Baby”, Campbell is Mommy, Emerson is baby, and I guess now I am getting prematurely aged to GRANDMA!  As if approaching my forties isn’t enough! 

But then I remembered my sister-in-law legitamely had four kids by the time she was 21 and a REAL grandmother by forty.  So I didn’t feel so bad. 

I will keep pretending to be FAKE Granny…at least they are handing me a FAKE tall, skinny vanilla late and cookie from their FAKE kitchen.

Look what Santa dropped off!  Beware…they are on the loose with FOUR wheels.