So…with kindergarten we have begun the process of working on sight words.  Today, among others, I was reviewing ‘boy’ and ‘girl’ with Gage.  When we came to the word girl, I attempted to give him a hint.

I said, “Campbell is a ….. ”

Gage immediately replied, “Desperate!”

I think he is missing the point of starting with the basics but it gave me the only belly laugh I have had for the day.

MUSTACHE | BRIGGS

Apparently, the notion of puberty is hot on Briggs’ mind after being in middle school for two weeks. He yelled down the hall while I was doing laundry, “Mom!  I think I am getting a mustache.”

I asked him to come into the stronger light of the laundry room to investigate his upper lip.

I sneered, “You mean the blond fuzz on top of your lip?”

Almost at the same time Briggs exclaimed, “Come to think about it…Mom…you have a mustache too!”

I felt swindled.  I yelled to the back of the van, “In the future, we are never buying Happy Meals again!”

Gage replied, “Mom, you can’t predict the future!”

There it is…my kindergartener.

Briggs has had a crush on one girl, in particular, for a few years. **For the sake of anonymity, her name has been changed below.** As we passed Arielle in the hall, I gave her a happy hello.  Briggs was unable to utter a word. 

He proceeded to tell me how embarassing I was at which point I explained he likely had the coolest mom in the entire fifth grade!  That was when I tripped…not only embarassing him more but realizing I may just think I am cool.

**Skip forward several hours.**

Briggs tends to divulge a lot of his feelings, and ask important questions at bedtime.  Like a computer, he is in his ‘shutdown’ process. 

………………….
Here was the exchange.

Briggs: 
So, Mom…how do I tell Arielle I like her?

Mom: 
Well, until you learn how to say ‘Hi’ to her, I wouldn’t worry about telling her you like her.  How about just starting off with something simple, such as “How was your summer?” or “Who is your homeroom teacher?”  or “Are you playing soccer this Fall?”

Briggs: 
I am not sure what I would say.

Mom: 
You are in fifth grade.  Why not just stick to being friends?

Gage <interjects with teasing>:
Briggs can’t tell Arielle he likes her!

Briggs <in the funniest comeback tone I have witnessed>:
Seriously, Gage.  You have an imaginary girlfriend named TreeTop.  I don’t think you should be teasing me.
………………..

And so it begins.  Middle School.  Girls.  Attitude.

The only way to get 250 miles by myself smoothly and effectively with as few stops as possible was…A BUCKET.  You can likely guess at this point what our bucket was used for. 

My kids pee often.  It doesn’t matter if they drink or not.  They just pee a lot.  Every single one of them.  Heck if I was going to stop every 30 miles!

I am kind of militant when it comes to road trips though.  I tend to dehydrate myself on most trips.  Tim is the opposite.  It is excruciating.

I padded the bucket with paper towels (each time), placed it ontop of a thick towel, and we were golden.  Down the road we went to visit the Parker’s.

Susan and I have known each other since first grade.  She is my oldest (well…longest) friend.  I love her.  In eleven years, we have had eight children (Macie, Briggs, Chase, Owen, Gage, Emerson, Campbell and Avery). 

Surprisingly, it went well.  The kids had a great time.  There were few arguments, and we were actually able to talk. 

My favorite moment occured just before our departurewhen Owen decided to stick the head of an army man up his nose.  Amazing how life is never dull and how the issues are always changing.

You will be happy to know that the kids asked if I could go to the Army so that you could stay home with them.  I have no doubt who their favorite parent is!  Mothers always get the shaft.

Lots of love from your F.A.M.I.L.Y

By the way, our bath routine for the summers has been pool time.  Chlorine is as effective as soap, right?

Now, if you have never heard the pure pleasure of Campbell’s volume, it is kind of like a bull horn. She has no concept of volume control. Because she is the tiniest in the family, we give her the excuse of trying to make up for her stature. Bottom line…she has been a loud ass from the moment she was born. Even the nurses couldn’t believe the set of lungs she had for being so little. Gosh, we are blessed!

Anyway, back to the story.

As Tim gets off a phone call, Campbell yells from the back, “Who was that?”

Tim replies, “My boss!”

Campbell, the-ever-so-smart, four going on fourteen girl, says, “You mean…MOMMY?”

While she may drive me nuts on a hourly, daily, weekly basis…I got to love every inch of her. She is not only super sharp, she’s got my back!